What else could happen at the baseball field?

So here is how my evening went down. (WARNING: This could gross you out) I load up my kids to take Nico to his baseball practice in Chino Hills and as we're walking out the door the thought comes to my head:
Rachel remember your diaper bag. You never know. (so you know, i always seem to forget my diaper bag. It's baby #3 I guess)
So I grab the bag. We leave for practice and all is well once we get there. While I am sitting with all the other parents the boys are given their water break and this is what I hear.

Nico: "Mom, Mom, MOM. "
Me: "What Nico?"
Nico: (yelling) You forgot to put my cup in my pants. And I have to pee.
Me: Beet Red, "um, it's ok, I think you're safe today"
Nico: "mom, you can't forget to put my cup in my pants next time, what if I get hit in the balls? and I have to Pee still?"
Me: "I won't forget and you can hold it."
Nico: "kay thanks mom"

So that was enough for me. But Sophie didn't think so. Sydney came up to me with about 10 minutes of practice left and told me Sophie didn't smell so good. I looked, and sure enough Syd was right. I figured well I'll just hold her for the next couple minutes and change her in the car before we went home.
Well I picked her up and the next thing I knew there was leakage coming out of every crevice she had. I don't think any baby in the history of the world ever leaked this much out of one self. So I quickly grabbed my keys, while holding Sophie like Superman so it wouldn't get on me and I made a mad dash to the car. Well as I'm running, it's dropping everywhere, on my jeans, my sweater, the top of my bare flip flopped foot and the ground. Oh yes and people were everywhere, this was not something I could even sort of hide.
We get to the car, and thank heavens I listened to myself and grabbed the diaper bag. But I don't even know where to start, if I try to take her clothes off over her head it will get in her hair. So I bust open the wipes and just start wiping and when I had done my best I stripped her clothing. Luckily I had my gym towel still in the car so she had something to lay on in the parking lot. Cause that was not coming in my car. We succesfully declothed, got wiped up and got a clean diaper on. Mind you that we went through the entire pack of wipes.

Ok we survived. I went back in gathered my kids at this point and headed to the car to come home. As I'm texting my sister Kelly (what up Kelly, this post is for you) to tell her the gross story and loading kids, Nico hits me with this.
"Mom, I still have to pee."
Ok, he's a boy, there are some bushes.
"Just go in the bushes in front of the car." (no big deal we do it all the time. ladies with boys you know what I'm talking about)
So the next thing I know I hear this:
"Excuse me mam?"
"yes?"
"Are you aware that your son in urinating on school property?'
I turn around, It's freakin Chino Valley Unified School District Campus Security.
"Oh, you're kidding, he's peeing over there?" Totally playing dumb.
"Mam, this is a school and he should not be doing that, you need to tell him that if he continues to do that as he gets older it's a crime and punishable by jail time."
I'm really trying to hold in laughter at this point and I say
"Yes, sir, you're absolutely right. We'll have a conversation about it right away. I wouldn't want him to do hard time because he peed in a bush. So sorry, won't happen again."
He glared at me, I smiled at him, winked at Nico and got in the car.

All I needed was for Sydney to vomit on the way home to come full circle. I'm hoping tomorrows trip to the ball field isn't as adventurous. I'd settle for a couple dirty kids and a runny nose. But maybe that's asking too much.